bzzzt...

Thursday, October 23, 2008

typing in candle light. electricity is too expensive.

walked in the rain. i had to sing my heart out.

lay on the floor. i wanted to feel the cold.

broke my phone. i needed everything else to stop.

downed half a bottle of baileys. i wanted to get drunk.

ate sleeping pills. i needed my sleep.

burned my finger. i felt the pain.

bit my lip till it bled. i tasted the blood.

i wanted to die. something.. something.. something.

tried smoking a breadstick. it was good.
tried to make a lamp.
tried to watch heroes season 3.
tried to tell you how much i wanted you to stay.
tried to stay awake.
tried not to skip literature.
tried doesnt mean i suceeded.

here i was, there i go.
10:44:00 PM

Friday, October 17, 2008

i wish you can hear the tunes going off in my head. because its a chorus of melodies.

you know when you close your eyes, tilt your head to the sky(even though theres like a ceiling or smt..), take a deep breathe, and fall away. when you come to, you know something has changed. thats how i feel right now.... but the change hurts like the scratch on my back.

i want to move up out and over. i want to upgrade. take off to the stars, and smt poetic that makes almost enough sence for you to realise what im saying. so chnge hurts.. but were all human we are adaptable right?... right... ofcourse we are. unfortunatly im barely surviving. i want to hermitize myself. learn how to fish, and be contented for life. or become like a terrorist. end my life for a cause i believe in. only problem.. i dont believe in causes. actually right now. i dont believe in anything. i hope that when i die. ppl look down at my coffin and go there goes a guy that lived one heck of a good life...

here i was, there i go.
8:44:00 PM

Monday, October 13, 2008

and the whole top diamond and the bottom rows gold.

nothing has happend. or has it?

hahaha recruiting a crowd for cover. im serious. i need a crowd.

today i started my long journey of exams i predict by the end i will be empty of information...

also i refuse to cut my hair.

looks like today is one of those days i ran outta things to say.

here i was, there i go.
8:05:00 PM

Friday, October 10, 2008

i feel like recreating another T i realise That without my Thoughts i am alone. but because of The Two i am never alone for my helmet of home is always full of echos of past discussions and woeful Tales of Trauma. yet i am driven to silence Them and Told to ignore The loud bellowing of mellodious solitude. you dont know how deafening silence is Till the quietest sound seems so loud. when that happens you realise That There are more sounds Than just being alone. and The quiet is booming find escape Through shadowy figures That Take over To mute The silence.

T20

here i was, there i go.
9:42:00 PM

Thursday, October 02, 2008

today i was told that im at stage one of a personality disorder... cooool huh.. now the only thing that would probably piss me off would be all those ass faces that suddenly contracted the diseases too..

now i have 2 babies.. glowybaby. as deemed by kiko.. and starrybaby? oh well im scared to show starry off.. its really nice.. and i bought it with my own money.. like nearly everything else i get... well my computer was from my parents.. but thats a different thing right...

and further more some guy went into my facebook and changed all the stuff. so its all fun now.. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

here i was, there i go.
9:23:00 PM

Sunday, September 14, 2008

so i sat down with my tub of sorbet.
thinking of wierd puns.
out of the blue, my cold and flu
disappeared with the sun.
the sky turned dark and the mood too grey
but i was busy with my fun
my limericks were all jello
as my gimicks turned mello
because i rememberd i was missing
the life i had been wishing
to spend it all with you.

oo ice cream makes my lines rhyme hehe.

here i was, there i go.
8:19:00 PM

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

i finally see i was holding onto a thread of desperation. awesome. i move on. with wires cutting into me as i move on. i dont know why but your cold calm contemplation burnt me. here its over. move on. why. my blind eyes did not see it. move on. i have concrete shoes for a grave. move on. this too shall pass said debra. move on. unhook the fish hooks and crack the chains. move on. shut up. move on. i dont want to. move on.

i want to gorge out my right eye, so i can enjoy my left better. poke. im along my self again so along i be will.

i can hope that you will one day see that your missing the times i was close. then maybe i might have a chance again. i wont screw up. il move on by the time that happens. freshly cut grass. do you get me now? i suffer from a heart disease uncurable so dont bother i guess.

cut me like butter

here i was, there i go.
7:59:00 PM